It always happens that when a sensitive topic comes up, there is a person who just can’t stop the tears. They try to hide it but their eyes swell and you know they are about to cry. But most of the time, the people around them don’t know how to handle this situation and end up being more awkward in front of them.
So these are tips to handle a “cry situation” :
1. Say “Aww don’t cry..” and keep your hand on their shoulders :
- Doing this will either lead to two things – the person will cry more or just joke it out saying “oh I’m not crying OK”.
- For the first response, you can just hug the person and he will eventually stop crying further.
- For the second response, the person will handle his tears himself as his response itself tells he can’t cry in front of others.
2. Change the topic:
- The best way out is to change the topic.
- Like for eg you are in your friend circle and you all are talking about your mother but there is one person who does not have a mother. So he will get uncomfortable or sad or even feel like crying if he’s talking. If this happens, you change the topic to, “oh leave this topic, you know what happened yesterday?” and say it with the same excitement or more excitement than the earlier topic. It will help the person get distracted by the curiousness for the new topic.
3. Share your sorrow too:
- Say “yes even my father abused me”. This will make the “crier” open up more and speak himself out.
- Like he might say “I know right! and my father also did….” then you say “yes but you know what, let’s leave this. I mean, I have moved on now and you should do it too.”
- Knowing that he/she is not the only one in sorrow, will help him/her relax about his situation.
- You can fake share too if the person is not a good friend or is not expected to meet you again. Like a person, you met on the train, on the road etc.
4. Offer a tissue :
- This is a great gesture and works well with girls. She will laugh at that gesture and change the topic on her own or handle herself on her own. In another scenario, she would cry more
- By the way, notice how the person in 1st point and the 4th point will act in 2 same possible ways. DIDN’T I TELL YOU GIRLS AND BOYS ARE THE SAME? huh. I had said the same on This blog
5. Joke it off :
- You can joke off the topic to make the crying person laugh. It will make them smile and they will calm themselves down.
6. Let them cry :
- Sometimes crying is good for emotional health.
- If he/she is crying, let them do so.
- If you all are in a friend circle, DEFIANTLY let them talk and cry and speak themselves out. Sometimes they just need a person to talk to.
- If you are in an unknown or less known group, check the crier’s actions and his mental level of comfort with the group. eg usually girls open up to girls and boys open up to boys.
- So, yeah, in an unknown group it depends on how much safe the crier sees the group.
7. Put your hand on their shoulder and say “Hey, you can overcome this” :
- Confronting them with motivational sentences will help them get over the negatives more easily.